For several months, I had practically given up distributing Srila Prabhupada’s books and even feeling connected to the spirit of sharing Krsna consciousness.
Nothing prevented me from going out on books I just lost my enthusiasm. Usually, I would go alone, which probably had something to do with it.
This is the one thing that definitely changed, having left the association of fellow monks, whose enthusiasm kept me bound to the spirited sharing of Krishna consciousness. Leaving their good company, I came to Toronto, where sankirtana and outreach is booming, like few other places in North America. Not participating in the sankirtana movement seems unlikely here yet somehow I’d changed my priorities and lost the feeling that it’s important to spread Krishna consciousness.
Until…
Recently I was visited by my friends in the ashram, and I took part in a two-hour sankirtana experience with a dedicated book distributor named Tirtha-Pavana. We went out together and just talked about our feelings regarding sankirtana. I was able to express a lot of doubts that I had to Tirtha-Pavana, and without budging, he encouraged me more and more to return to the service that I used to prefer. I became really enthusiastic after revealing my sankirtana scars in confidence to Tirtha-Pavana and having them each individually healed. In the end he challenged me to do the amount of book distribution that I felt comfortable with, and he said, “Try and approach five people every day.”
I had lost sight of the reasons for performing sankirtana, but now I feel ready to do it, to honour my encouraging friend to whom I gave my word. Since that day, I have maintained an amount of sankirtana that is appropriate for me. I feel a reformed enthusiasm for spiritual life, centred on sankirtana.
Yesterday, I took a moment to approach people at Dundas Square. Out of five people I approached, one stopped to talk. His name was Colin. I presented him with a copy of The Nectar of Instruction and a card for the Bhakti Lounge. As I explained the activities taking place at the Bhakti Lounge, he related his happiness to hear that things like kirtan are catching on.
He didn’t have any small donations to offer, and he didn’t want to give a large donation either. But when I offered him the First Canto (in addition to The Nectar of Instruction) and told him that I could give him change, he was ready to take both books. He expressed gratitude that I was helping to create a positive change in society. I pointed out a verse that I had just been reading (Bhag. 1.5.10), and he spontaneously said that he was going to spend time that night focussing on this verse. What great encouragement and reciprocation it was for me to meet Colin!
Then, having done the small part that Tirtha-Pavana encouraged me to do, I ran with enthusiasm to go associate with devotees at the Bhakti Lounge. Sankirtana offers access to a really invigorating spiritual charge.
Seeking blessings from the Vaisnava community to keep sankirtana in my sights, I remain
Your servant,
Yogendra Dasa